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A ‘slip over’ into marriage

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In campo, Fridays are synonymous with the Great Wildebeest Migration. Our girls move in droves to their boyfriends’ abodes. Then come Monday morning, the boastful migration morphs into a terrible walk of shame. For Kevo, Fridays were always frustrating. Every time he called Truphena to his place for a sleep over, she claimed she had an emergency. Her excuses were usually funny. One time, her grandma had swallowed a spoon and needed moral support! 

Kevo frequently threw tantrums and always doubted if she was avoiding him because of his mushroom sized nose. What irked him the most was the idea of sleeping with his arms around a teddy bear while all his friends cuddled with their girlfriends. Yet whenever they met, Tru didn’t even apologise. She seemed perfectly OK with a relationship founded on occasional WhatsApp chats. She thought their weekly hugs were more than enough to keep the relationship alive.

Kevo’s patience finally ran out when his neighbor’s girlfriend came and during her visit, scrubbed floors, washed dishes and ironed all three of his neighbour’s jeans. When he saw this, he angrily confronted Tru. He bared his soul, saying he craved her feminine presence. Then he dropped an ultimatum. ‘Either you come over today, or we part ways,’ he told her. 

Truphena agreed, but she took things too seriously. The next Friday, she showed up carrying a pan. She prepared soft, layered chapatis which left Kevo grinning from ear to ear. It was more than he could ever ask for! The following week, Truphena came with colourful curtains. Kevo was blinded by the blossoming love.

Bit by bit, she brought her stuff and left them at Kevo’s. The poor bedsitter was bursting at the seams with houseware and its sweaty smell was replaced by a sweet, lavender fragrance.  A month later, Tru came with her whole wardrobe. And with that, her permanent migration to Kevo’s house was complete. Our dude is dazed. Tru has become more nagging than an entitled baby mama. Sukuma ya Ten is no longer her cup of tea. Pork is her irreducible minimum. Poor Kevo now has to think of creative ways to convince his parents to send him more money. 

She became more dramatic every day and only then did it dawn on Kevo that he had brought the misery to himself. He was frustrated and frightened, yet Truphena was busy conjuring names for their first baby! He had slipped from singlehood into a campus marriage with a single sleepover! 



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