NERIMA: Share the most you can during this season and every other day next year

It is the holiday season, and the two things that come to mind during this period is rest and family.

In western countries there are activities that allow people to meet, because Christmas can be the loneliest time of the year. Especially for people who do not have the traditional nuclear family around. This is also difficult for people who live and work abroad. In fact, there is an increase of suicides during this time.

When we talk about the holiday season at home, it would be described as a time for sharing. The culture of sharing is something that we experience every holiday season.

During this time, we put family at the centre. Sharing a meal with each other, after a church service, with newly bought clothes, after a service at the village church.

We invite family members to share a meal with one another. And we may not have much, but during this season we make sure to collect what we can to share the most that we can.

So where did this shortage mentality come from? Have you ever attended a political rally or event where free merchandise was distributed? It could be T-shirts or even calendars. Basically anything. There was an event that I attended that had hundreds of people, and the organisers were distributing T-shirts. I remember seeing a stampede build up as people rushed to get a T-shirt. I was fearful for a brief moment as some tripped in the process, I thought that there would be injuries.

Later, when we organised events, we would always be asked whether there are T-shirts. Fighting to get a T-shirt sounds trivial. But we do it with several other things.

There is this sense of competition everywhere and granted competition can be healthy, but should there be times to be competitive? For instance, it is difficult to call youth meetings because groups don't trust each other. We have been systematised to compete against each other always, because the ‘other’ will take from ‘us’.

One of the greatest lessons that I gathered from a conference was one on abundance, and I hadn't even realised it was being taught. I had travelled to South Africa on a five-day conference. On the first day we were instructed to pass by a room to collect materials for the entire week. I remember getting into the room and seeing the set-up, of hundreds of T-shirts on display, pens, stickers and notebooks. I walked up to the counter and began by collecting one of each. This was different because materials are handed to you when you walk in to a conference hall, or placed on your table where you sit.

Another glaring difference, there was hardly anyone present at the desk, and participants could pass by any time they wanted. On the second day, I was curious to see if any merchandise was left and if I could get more for my colleagues.

When I passed the room, I saw a friend collect up to 10 pens. And I was surprised at the fact that items were being stocked. And there was a lady arranging stickers, and I asked, "How many can we take? What is my limit?" She responded by saying as many as you want. And I was confused. She continued to say: "Take as many as you want, even for family, friends, colleagues, whatever…we have enough, take as much as you need." At that moment I realised that I was more accustomed to hearing that something had ran out — not that there was enough! Then she proceeded to mention that we need to teach each other a culture of abundance.

Many of us come from societies where we are literally starved. So when we get a chance, we grab as much as possible as soon as possible. That is the same for our politicians and when they enter power. They try as hard as possible to benefit, because their time is limited. When we learn that we can create enough to share, and we all receive, we are much happier. This is the lesson abundance.  What a lesson on something that I didn't even realise we struggle with. For the youth space, unhealthy competition within the space has created such a great division, that there is no youth voice, we are either divided by class, tribe, political affiliation, or even religion. Divided because there is a belief that the space is limited.

Because we think that there is only limited room for some to succeed, we tend to be selfish with opportunity.

So during this time, as we gather to share, may we think of ways to constantly share every day.

Nerima Wako-Ojiwa is executive director of Siasa Place. Twitter: @NerimaW