Nothing wrong with some song and dance at Winnie’s funeral

If you are a keen social media user, you have most probably come across an interesting video in which mourners jubilantly dance to the Wamlambez tune while going round what looks like a fresh grave. The videos, which have attracted thousands of views, have also drawn their fair share of opprobrium and vituperation, with many wondering how in the world people in their right minds do such a thing.

All in all, the reception of those videos has been poor. People seemed disgusted, and some even went ahead to speculate about the deceased.

Today, I want to take this opportunity to tell this to all those who had an opinion on the young people dancing around that fresh grave: back off. Just back off.

Mind your own business and stop saying evil things about a person you never knew. It is easy to malign the dead because they cannot speak for themselves, but today, this ends here.

I say this because I knew the deceased.

Allow me to introduce Winnie ‘Mickey’ Linyerera, a young woman whom I have known for close to 15 years now.

Today, August 17, Mickey, as we used to call her, would have turned 25 if she had not died so suddenly exactly two weeks ago. Mickey was a brave, solid young woman. The kind of girl who would not shy away from any opportunity to speak her mind. She was not the type to turn down an exciting road trip or a party because she was the life of the party.

Mickey lost her mother to cancer when she was still a teenager. She understood the pain and loss of having to grow up without a mother. It is, perhaps, for this reason that Mickey was far wise and mature beyond her years and why she remained the anchor and the peacemaker of her family.

A fashionable, stylish young woman, you would often catch Winnie in her signature off-shoulder tops paired with jeans, not forgetting her hoop earrings and a perfectly made up face. Such was the life of Mickey — carefree but careful, strong and respectful.

Mickey was also a loving mother to the most adorable four-year-old boy.

But more relevant to the series of events over the past few days, Mickey was an outgoing, free-spirited young woman who loved to dance. In the days leading up to her painful send-off, her army of friends checked in at their home in Mulwanda, Kakamega County, 48 hours before the funeral. The youngsters assisted her family with their chores and contributed money to offset some bills. They also provided her family with much needed comfort. They showed her family that the girl who lay in the ground was a loved and treasured person.

When the burial was finally over, after Winnie’s body was committed to the ground, it was that moment — that precise moment — that her friends and family realised that their girl was gone forever. What, they wondered, would Winnie have preferred? Would she have approved of her family and friends mourning without hope? Certainly not! Winnie would have preferred that they celebrate her life.

And what better way to celebrate than with song and dance, in the typical Mickey fashion? Music was played — all kinds of music: gospel, dirges, and the song of the moment, the one that resonated with Winnie’s agemates, Wamlambez.

I keep wondering what would have happened if they shared the video of her friends dancing to a gospel song. Would it have been considered ‘taking it too far’?

This is what happens when people pass judgement on matters out of context. I think we should leave Winnie’s loved ones to process their grief the best way they know how to. You may not approve of the song, but to me the song is irrelevant. The real issue here is that a group of young people were misunderstood and victimised for honouring their friend.

People mourn differently — some do it quietly in a corner, and others, like Winnie’s buddies, dance around what is now her new home.

One of her friends, Mercy, couldn’t have put it better in her Facebook post: “At the end of the day, the fact we have the courage to still be standing is reason enough to celebrate your life, Linyerera Winnie, Which Was Well Lived, With No Regrets! We think there is endless time to live but we never know which moment is last. So share, care, love, and celebrate every moment of life. Rest With The Angels Darling”.

I have no problem with people flagging bad behaviour on social media. But this was a big miss. There was no ill intention involved here. There was no malice or obscenity. What there is here, my friends, is the legacy of a young woman at stake. We must not let sideshows and social media idlers to muddy it.

Winnie Mickey Linyerera was a remarkable young woman and mother, and that is how we should remember her.

Ms Chege is the director, Innovation Centre, Aga Khan University Graduate School of Media and Communications;