Tinder Swindler: A Case Study in Character Development

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By Jay Kioko

Finally, I watched Tinder Swindler and boy oh boy! didn’t I not sympathise with those women? Losing so much money and putting in your time in a worthless love affair can be suicidal.

It’s normal for men to be ‘swindled’ in a love affair. Most often than not women swindle men sub-consciously… It’s not that overt. But when a man wants to eat a woman, ‘wanga Kativui aisanîasya vamwe na mavwia'( he eats together with the feathers). A man who wants to benefit from a woman has his strategy well written. His goals are clear. All his deceptions are shrouded in a very deep show of love.

I have met women who have fallen prey to swindling through the guise of love. Many have bought land and cars and other properties for men whom they thought they were in love with but the men were just in business.

This is a documentary I would recommend to all fathers and mothers who have girls. It’s a must watch for all women. The bottom line… don’t fall in love blindly and especially if you are a rich woman. Utakulwa , literally and figuratively.

There are several key lessons we can learn from this movie;

1. Looks can be decieving… You will get that tall bearded handsome guy but inside he is skunk…dirtier than a pig. In short, all that glitters is not gold. Simon Liviev was just a criminal wanted back home in Israel for fraud.
2. Do not ignore red flags… Have a sharp eye. There were red flags that were as clear as the current Ruto and Uhuru relationship but the women ignored all that. Someone who loves you will never let you do things that may endanger your life.
3. Do not be lured by the personality people project online or money. Both men and women have been know to travel all the way from Mukuru kwa Njenga to go to The Hub in Karen, Two Rivers and other expensive looking places to take photos and post those on social media. Don’t fall for that.
4. Do not collect a loan on behalf of anyone or give large amounts of money to people. That is very clear and I need not go deeperOr should I?
5. Do not share private details with people you just met. No one needs to know where you live, how much you earn, who your parents are on the first date. On the first date, the conversations should be light and be about enjoying yourself and not like a job interview.
6. Spot a potential abuser from a distance. An abuser will tell you, “I love you, I need you. I can’t imagine life without you” while hurting you so deeply, and you might use the words for comfort while denying the clear physical actions.
7. Love bombing is a real thing. Love bombing is a form of emotional abuse which makes you vulnerable and susceptible to getting hurt. It is very strange to meet a man for the first time and he starts sharing deep life secrets, showering you with excess love and attention without pacing it to gauge how he really feels.

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